Category Archives: Failure

I’m practically a star now…

Dancing With the Aiken Stars was last night!!  You guys have heard me talk about it for months now.  We finally performed last night and get this…WE WON!  Okay, we didn’t win the whole shebang which is based on the number of votes you get, but we did win Judge’s Choice which I think is kinda better…simply because they are basing their judgment on performance.  The votes have been coming in for months now so they weren’t only based on performance. Anyway, I felt like a total diva last night.  I failed miserably at taking pictures but I was just so pumped up and freaking out at the same time, that I didn’t even worry with a camera.  I did take this post- performance awesome selfie with Megan in the dressing room (aka locker room).

photo (3)Megan and her sister, along with my parents and Matt, came out to show some love.  My coworkers also made giant neon colored signs and were a phenomenal support group.  There were actually 3 of us from the same company participating last night so we had a lot of people come out to see us.

As much as I bitched and complained about this experience–the money spent, the time consuming aspect–I would do it all over again.  Not only did we help raise money for a wonderful cause, we freakin’ rocked.  I got to know some of my colleagues in such a different way and we enjoyed spending time together. I’m actually going to miss that.  Now that dance practice won’t be consuming my evenings, I’m ready to get back in the spin & weight training game.  I am teaching spin this Sunday and I’m really looking forward to it.

Tomorrow, we are headed to Athens to watch the Dawgs play.  It’s a 7 pm game…Lord help me.  We might freeze and teaching spin after a night like we will have tomorrow maaaaay not be the brightest idea I’ve ever had.  But it will happen. Well, I’m off to munch on work-Thanksgiving leftovers.  There is basically no reason for me to worry about eating right at this point.  I look forward to this kind of eating all year long!

 

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Filed under Dancing with the Aiken Stars, Failure, family, Food, Football Season, Football Season SEC, Friends, Life, Spin, Spinning, University of Georgia, Weekend

A lazy week. Well, not really.

It’s been a lazy week in my workout world–but not everywhere else.  I’ve been slammed at work this week so I’ve been working late and through lunches.  I’ve also been pretty productive at the house (which usually gets pushed to the side). After work today, I finally found my Halloween costume…

photo 1 (6)Bet you can’t guess who I’m going to be…

Then I came home and Matt made us breakfast for dinner.  I’m talkin’ the whole nine yards…pancakes, eggs, bacon, and cheese crescents.  It was so nice to eat dinner by like 7:30.  I’m usually just getting home from work and the gym by that time.  Then I have to shower and cook (well, I don’t actually do the cooking).  And it ends up being 9 pm before we eat dinner.  Yes, I do feel completely worthless this week as far as my body goes.  But my mind feels good.  I feel rested. My house is in some kind of order.  I’m prepared for the weekend–meaning I got my friend’s baby shower gifts ready to go and even ironed my outfit.  Yes, I said ironed.  (Plus, I know we are going out Friday and I won’t want to do it Saturday morning before the shower = GENIUS.)

I also went through some giant Rubbermaid containers on the hunt for Christmas gifts I put away last year.  I tend to buy a lot of stuff on clearance right after Christmas for the next year.  Problem is, I forget about it.  Well looky at what I found…

photo 2 (5)Bath & Body Works overload!  I love when I find goodies like this.  I won’t need to buy soap for a year.  And I already have little gifts ready to go for girlfriends and coworkers.

Well, time for me to get some rest.  I’m contemplating getting up early for a run–but not in the dark…at the gym.  We shall see.  No pressure.  I’m so tired of pressuring myself.  Mental health is important too.  I find, however, that it’s a catch 22.  I feel good mentally that I got a lot of things scratched off the to-do list this week.  On the flip side, I feel like complete crap mentally because in the back of my mind, I’m obsessing over how I look…the food I’ve eaten, the lack of cardio.  Everything.  And to put the cherry on top, we had a photo shoot for the Dancing with the Aiken Stars last week. Well I look like a complete moron in the picture that the group wants to use.  Seriously.  Everyone else is smiling and I’m doing some weird caught-me-in-the-middle-of-a-sentence duck face.  What the hell.  It’s on Facebook too, which is super nice.  I try to laugh it off.  I even told the ring leader that I didn’t care–it was all about what the majority of the group wanted to use.  I’m trying to play that whole confidence card.  Part of me really doesn’t give a crap while the other part of me is completely embarrassed.

Okay, I actually feel better that I got to put that out there.  I’ve been wanting to complain about that picture but I WON’T.  Gotta play that confidence card.  Is that healthy though?  I’m good at being fake, basically.

 

 

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Filed under Cook, Dancing with the Aiken Stars, Failure, Food, Lessons, Life, Morning Workout, Relax, Rest, spouse, Weekend

3-Day Weekend Recap + Picture Fail.

I was about to say “Happy Monday” until I realized it’s Tuesday.  It is my Monday–one great thing about the banking industry is federally reserved holidays.  I has a massage for breakfast yesterday, Rhinehart’s for lunch, and a pedicure for dinner.  All out pamper fest.  I don’t know what got into me.  I had a certificate for the massage.  And I really just wanted to enjoy the extra day off exactly how wanted to.

This weekend wasn’t exceptionally thrilling but there were a few exciting moments.  Friday night, we ended up at Chili’s with our friends, Bess & Chunky. Saturday morning, I got ready for a sweet girl’s 1st birthday party.  Her cake was super cute!

photo (62)And no, surprisingly I did not indulge in cake OR cupcakes.  Wasn’t in the mood. Which actually troubles me. Anyway, I left the party a little early so I could meet up with Allison.  We went to Columbia to meet Presley and Aubrie for a girls’ night.  We were all actually supposed to be in Atlanta this weekend to run the Pretty Muddy Mud Run but for whatever reason, the race was cancelled.  So we opted for a night out in Columbia instead.  I’m usually really good at making sure we get group photos.  That being said, this is the only picture I have from Saturday night…

photo (63)Thrilling.   I know.  I think one of the girls was trying to get in some good stretching before the night kicked off 😉  I have absolutely no work outs to tell you about becaaaause there haven’t been any.  I do plan on doing some things around the house after work today and then going for a “long run.”  We will see how long that run goes.  The right ball of my foot is really hurting me today.  It’s been bothering me for about 2 years now.  I’m sure if I went to an orthopedist, he would tell me to quit wearing heels.  I’m sorry but I find it pretty difficult to be a woman in the business/professional world and not wear heels–and I’m a girlie girl at that.  I wear heels almost every day during the work week.  But anyway, my foot has been bothering me more than normal lately.

So yeah, that was my exciting 3-day weekend recap.  Have you ever had a problem with a constant, nagging pain in the ball of your foot?  I’m hoping that running isn’t making it worse…

 

 

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Filed under Advice, Birthday, Failure, Friends, kids, Life, Run, Seafood, Training, Travel, Workout

Started from the bottom…

Earlier this year, I could have sang along to that song and meant it…”started from the bottom now <I’m> here…”  Now, not so much.  I trained my butt off last year for my first half-marathon in January.  I really had started from the bottom. Yesterday, I realized I’m back at the bottom.  I told y’all I was going to run 5 miles yesterday.  Well, I made it 5 miles but I wasn’t running the entire time.

I remember a time when 5 miles was my favorite distance…not too long, not too short.  Yesterday, I was good to make it 2 miles before I had to take a break.  2 MILES.  Seriously people.  My grandma can do that for goodness sake.  I ran/walked the next 3 miles until I called it quits.  I was so disappointed and mad at myself.  I had worked so hard before and I let it all go.  Then again, I went out yesterday with the mentality that this was something I had to do.

Training for me becomes a have to, another job, just another thing I must do in order not to fail.  I’ve told y’all before and I’ll say it again…I hate training.  I won’t give up and I will do well in November.  I’ve already committed and paid for the race so there is no looking back.  But after that, I want to get back to MY basics.  I was born (so to speak) to ride a bike (okay, a stationary bike).  I LOVE to spin.  Training for races keeps me off the bike which in turn kinda pisses me off.  Training also keeps me from doing things like yoga and barre, two other activities I love.  I don’t have enough time during the week to fit all of those activities in and still train.

I love the actual races and I am excited for the Savannah half…too bad it isn’t that easy.  Too bad we can’t just get out there and GO.  When I first started running, it was so exciting and new…something I had never pushed my body to do before.  I’ve done the 5Ks, the 10Ks, and now the halfs.  After this, I’m done guys.  At least for a while.  Until the actual urge to race comes back.  If I run, I want it to be because I want to…not because I feel like I have to.  Not to mention, races aren’t cheap.  Okay, you runners out there are probably all pissed at me now and think I’m giving up.  I’m not…running just isn’t a passion of mine just as spinning may not be a passion of yours.

Now that I’m over that rant, I want to show you why I should never wear shorts in public…

photo 2 (2)That red circle encompasses the bruises I found yesterday.  I’ll be out and see cute girls with great looking legs…and then there’s busted ol’ me.  Bruised up, veined up, mosquito bites everywhere.  I’m like a 12 year old boy mixed with an 80 year old lady.  How do I end up like this?  Anyway, after my 5 miles run/walk, I came home to a delicious well-plated meal by Chef Spires…

photo 1 (2)I thought this was a step in the right direction.  We usually have rice or some other starch and he steered away from those.  He seasoned the chicken with some of my box wine (awww yeah) and some Italian dressing.  It was delish.  I’m so glad the Lord paired me with a man that can cook…andddd I’m sure you are wondering why we have paper plates from Papa John’s.  Matt worked there for ten years.  We are on our last pack though…guess I’m going to have to start buying our own!!

Can anyone remotely relate to how I feel about training/running? Maybe you feel that way about another activity. Let me know.

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Filed under Advice, Failure, Food, Lessons, Race, Run, Spin, Spinning, spouse, Training, Workout

Let’s Get Personal…

This is probably the most personal post I’ve ever written.  Not sure how I feel about opening up this much but hey, I need a therapy session and I’m broke.  So here goes…

This weekend was full of fun times, let downs, fun times again, let downs again, and then some reflecting on my part. Friday was so much fun.  We celebrated Bess’ birthday and everyone had a great time.

photo (56)

Disregard the burrito eating. Boys and pictures…

As you all know, I was supposed to run a 5k Saturday morning.  Well, I’m not going to get into the details but we had a family emergency that kept me up half the night and the race never happened for me.  I also ended up with a dead cell phone and no charger so I didn’t wake up in time to tell my friends that were running with me what was going on.  I literally called them 6 minutes before the race began.  They were completely understanding but I was a basket case all morning.  I felt like I had let my friends down.  It seriously ate a hole through me.  I know that things happen.  And that’s what I have to remind myself…things are going to happen that are out of my control.  There is nothing I can do and I have to learn a better way to deal with that.  After balling my eyes out and running around the house thinking I could make it to the race in 6 minutes, I hung up the running shorts and knew I had failed…at least that’s how I felt. Then I began to obsess about “what would I say on the blog?”  “What do I tell people who ask how the race went?”  I came to the conclusion of who freakin’ cares.  I don’t have to explain anything if I don’t want to and so now here I am trying to explain…oh the irony.

Despite the madness and tears, I also had other people depending on me and Matt to go to a football game.  So I hopped in the shower and out the door we went.  I’m glad I had to keep moving; otherwise, I would have probably been a cry baby all day and just brought myself down more.  The game was fun.  It just rained practically all day and kinda put a damper on the day…

photo (57)

Thankful for dresses like this…they dry quickly!

photo (55)

The stands started emptying out when the rain got heavy…

photo (58)

Rain or no rain, still my favorite place on earth.

photo (6)

Matt–the ultimate creepy photobomber.

photo (59)After the game, we found a good spot to eat and decided to head on home.  We had every intention of being 20-somethings in downtown Athens but we were tired, damp, and ready for clean, comfy clothes.  Matt and I ended up in bed at 8 pm and didn’t move until around 10:30 the next morning.  We have done that for the last 2 Saturday nights and I can truly say it feels awesome.  It’s quality time together and we get to recharge for the week ahead.  

Yesterday, I went through another inside-Logan’s-head-battle and finally cried enough to convince Matt to make me breakfast 🙂  The inner battle I constantly face is people-pleasing.  I don’t want this post to get too long so I am going to focus on priorities more next time but I think I really need to evaluate who I place in my life and where I place them. Right now, this is what I believe the pecking order looks like:

  • Family
  • Friends
  • Matt
  • Me
  • God

Work and gym fit in there somewhere too.  Probably around the “me” line.  But this is what I believe my pecking order should look like:

  • God
  • Matt
  • Me
  • Family
  • Friends

I focus so much on making sure other people happy that I don’t focus on what’s actually important in my life.  I don’t focus on the one person who should get my full attention–my husband.  I’ve always been a people-pleaser and I have always cared way too much about what people think–did what I say hurt their feelings? Did what I say make them mad?  Did me cancelling that plan hinder my friendship with that person?  Yes, people should care about those things to an extent but I OBSESS about them.  Some people don’t care about that stuff at all. Anyway, I don’t want to get into this too much in one post so until next time…does anyone have any advice?  Or does anyone understand where I’m coming from?  Come on y’all, this was totally a pity party post…make me feel better 😉

On a positive note, I’ve had a great Monday and I hope you have too.  And one thing that has kept me positive today is something a friend told me yesterday…don’t dwell on what you didn’t do right today or if you didn’t do enough–focus on how you can make tomorrow better.  

 

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Filed under Advice, Blog, Failure, family, Football Season, Football Season SEC, Friends, Lessons, Life, Marriage, Prioritize, Run, SEC Football, Uncategorized, Weekend